Thursday, March 21, 2013

Your personality, wanna change it?

  Most of my life i have always been a ladies man, always in their midst, they enjoy my company as i love being with them also, cracking jokes, making off hand remarks and complimenting everything about them but when i'm with the guys . . .*smh* I'm a mess. I always come across as not serious, over-playful and not responsible. My life is that way because , I'm sanguine, I've sometimes wished i was like this guy or that but deep down i am happy with who i am and everybody should also. I'm sure sometime in  your life you wished you behaved like this person or that, its time to stop that line of thought.
   All human beings fall into four basic temperament groups, sanguine, choleric, melancholic and phlegmatic. This temperaments define a lot of things we do consciously and unconsciously. Our personality, the way we think, the way we relate to people everything about us socially and in other facets of our lives are driven by our temperaments. The basic difference between each is the amount of time it takes one to react and the duration of the resultant reaction. The sanguine reaction will be quick but brief, the pragmatics's long and brief, the choleric's quick and enduring, and the melancholic's lengthy and permanent. This simple definition has more relevance than appears at first glance.


The sanguine temperament is fundamentally impulsive and pleasure-seeking; sanguine people are sociable and charismatic. They tend to enjoy social gatherings, making new friends and tend to be boisterous. They are usually quite creative and often daydream. However, some alone time is crucial for those of this temperament. Sanguine can also mean sensitive, compassionate and romantic. Sanguine personalities generally struggle with following tasks all the way through, are chronically late, and tend to be forgetful and sometimes a little sarcastic. Often, when they pursue a new hobby, they lose interest as soon as it ceases to be engaging or fun. They are very much people persons. They are talkative and not shy. Sanguines generally have an almost shameless nature, certain that what they are doing is right. They have no lack of confidence. Sanguine people are warm-hearted, pleasant, lively and optimistic. At first glance, the sanguine appear to be the most friendly of people, and, indeed, they are the most at ease in social situations. Nonetheless, they remain blind to the effect their actions or decisions may have on others. Being peripheral in their relationships, they seldom are the ones who can offer strength and support to others - they are unreliable, not through callousness, but because of their lack of depth. It would be a sanguine sort who would be puzzled by how others could revolt at injustice - and their response well may be something like "but the rest of the village had to do it, too.


The choleric temperament is fundamentally ambitious and leader-like. They have a lot of aggression, energy, and/or passion, and try to instill that in others. They are task oriented people and are focused on getting a job done efficiently; their motto is usually "do it now." They can dominate people of other temperaments with their strong wills, especially phlegmatic types, and can become dictatorial or tyrannical. Many great charismatic military and political figures were cholerics. They like to be in charge of everything and are good at planning, as they often can immediately see a practical solution to a problem. However, they can quickly fall into deep depression or moodiness when failures or setbacks befall them. Their depth and intensity makes them more likely to have the militant (in the best sense) approach that makes for the founders, heroes, and zealots. The choleric's strength is zeal, his weakness anger. How he channels his great personal conviction and power will be key to his life. The choleric are likely to be what we today would term "achievers."


The melancholic temperament is fundamentally introverted and is given to thought. Melancholic people often are perceived as very (or overly) pondering and are both considerate and very cautious. They are organized and schedule oriented, often planning extensively. Melancholics can be highly creative in activities such as poetry, art, and invention - and are sensitive to others. Because of this sensitivity and their thoughtfulness they can become preoccupied with the tragedy and cruelty in the world and are susceptible to depression and moodiness. Often they are perfectionists. Their desire for perfection often results in a high degree of personal excellence but also causes them to be highly conscientious and difficult to relate to because others often cannot please them. They are self-reliant and independent, preferring to do things themselves in order to meet their standards. One negative part of being a melancholic is that they can get so involved in what they are doing they forget to think of other issues. Their caution enables them to prevent problems that the more impulsive sanguine runs into, but can also cause them to procrastinate and remain in the planning stage of a project for very long periods. Melancholics prefer to avoid much attention and prefer to remain in the background; they do, however, desire recognition for their many works of creativity. The depth and dedication of the melancholic will meet or exceed that of the choleric, but his natural caution and slowness to embrace new courses of action can leave him with a sense of having no way to channel his profound ideals.The melancholic will not understand an approach to human interaction that is either peripheral or expedient. He will naturally assume that all human behavior is based on his own consideration of lofty concepts. It may take years for a melancholic to develop any sort of closeness with those he meets, but, that done, he will be your most devoted friend or your worst enemy, and either will be "forever." Once harmed personally, exposed to grave injustice, or even seeing that, for example, those in authority have personal gain rather than the welfare of those they rule as their goals, his disillusionment will be strong and usually unshaken.


The phlegmatic temperament is fundamentally relaxed and quiet, ranging from warmly attentive to lazily sluggish. Phlegmatics tend to be content with themselves and are kind. Phlegmatics are consistent, they can be relied upon to be steady and faithful friends. They are accepting and affectionate, making friends easily. They tend to be good diplomats because their tendency not to judge and affable nature makes reconciling differing groups easy for them. Phlegmatics prefer to observe and to think on the world around them while not getting involved. They may try to inspire others to do the things which they themselves think about doing. They may be shy and often prefer stability to uncertainty and change. Their fear of change (and of work) can make them susceptible to stagnation or laziness, or even stubbornness. They are consistent, relaxed, calm, rational, curious, and observant, qualities that make them good administrators. They can also be passive-aggressive.The phlegmatic lack the sparkle of the sanguine, but are also quite adaptable - and will not be likely to "rock the boat", neither through the zeal of the choleric and melancholic, nor unwittingly as with the sanguine. Frequently they can be extraordinary scholars. Those intellectually gifted have the unique ability to be something approaching purely cognitive. Neither passion nor the need for attention will cloud their judgment and speculation.

Even though there are four temperaments, there are not four different kinds of people! Most people exhibit the tendencies of a combination of at least two of the temperaments, often even some of the traits of a third. Besides this, we have our upbringing, the way we have reacted to events in our lives, our religious convictions and our values, our decisions, and many factors that come together to make us what we are.The greatest error, today, is to believe that those of one temperament should seek to develop the characteristics of another. The true challenge is to accept the beauty of one's own nature. So people whatever group you fall in you are a winner, somebody likes you, adores you, believes in you. Don't try to be someone else. Your temperament is your life, don't try to change it. Have a nice day.

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